This Thanksgiving I was told stories of thankless people. What? Wrong holiday.

I must say I'm not someone who says how thankful or how blessed I feel. I kind of think you need to grow up in a religious family to learn to say these kinds of things. It's gotta be a forced mantra before it becomes natural to say such things (not saying that when people say they're thankful it's forced...just i don't think it's a natural thing for us as humans to do). But I DO appreciate people in my life. I really don't think I take anything for granted, much. And on Thanksgiving I do often self-reflect on things that I'm thankful for (thank god i'm not from a family that makes a habit of exclaiming these things out-loud, for example).

But some people are real assholes. Let me share and the lessons we can learn from them:

One person, T,  I know had Thanksgiving at her new in-laws. Granted, this is not the first time T's spent time with this family, but the first time since making the union official. T's mother-in-law complained nonstop about the cooking that would be issued from her sister-in-law's kitchen. T thought the worst, but was pleasantly surprised; a very fine meal indeed. This aunt (or sister-in-law to MIL) also had a few drinks, maybe one too many, but just one. After they left to retire to the in-laws the MIL continued the rant against the aunt, her cooking, and her drinking. How dare she!

Thanksgiving Lesson NO 1: If the food makes you sick, sure you have a right to complain. But if it doesn't? Shut the fuck up, learn to enjoy and at the very least be THANKFUL someone cooked your ass dinner.

Thanksgiving Lesson NO 2: People ARE going to maybe drink too much on this holiday. Especially if they have to put up with someone complaining about the meal they just slaved over. Get used to it.

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My sister and brother-in-law attend a particular church. One of the things they do as a church every year is offer to rake leaves for people in the community--of course the target audience is people whom cannot physically rake the leaves themselves, but anyone who asks can be put on the list.

There's this lady in town who's very, um, different. She doesn't do anything to her yard--she never waters it, mows it, or otherwise cares for it. That's fine, yards can be harsh on the environment--but if you're not going to do a damn thing, plant the right type of grasses (which can and does look really cool). Or landscape it with rocks. or plant a vegetable garden. She hasn't painted her house in years either. So the place looks like crap. It looks abandoned.

Anyhow she's also different in other ways. I'm sure she could physically rake her 'yard' if she wanted, but obviously she doesn't want to to do anything to her yard. She told someone we know, H,  at the senior center (she volunteers time there--nice--but no one likes here so they dread seeing her) that she'd like to be put on the list for the church yard raking. H said fine, and passed it on to the congregation at the next church gathering. Someone said "oh. I'll make sure it gets done!" knowing full well if it was missed (as it could most likely be missed--running out of time, see an 'abandoned' house on the list, and off they go to the next house) they'd never hear the end of it.

Day of the raking comes and goes--not that long ago.  H said that she saw this woman down at the senior center earlier in the week. H asked nicely "Did your yard get raked?" and the lady said "yes" and H smiled and said "good! just wanted to follow through". The lady instead of muttering one word of thanks grabs H and said "You know, I didn't think they were going to come. It was getting late." and H stared at her dumbfounded and asked "But they did come?" and the lady continued saying "yes they came, but where were the young people?" H replied with "excuse me?" and the lady said "Where are the young people? The people that came was a man my age (which isn't that old by the way--60 maybe?) and someone that looked like his son with a little boy. Where are the young people? They should be out doing this stuff. They just want to be paid for their work these days. They won't do anything."

H had no idea what to say. So she just said "Well. I don't have anything to do with it. I just wanted to make sure your yard was raked. Thank you". And left her.

Thanksgiving Lesson NO 3: if someone rakes your yard, no matter their age--be thankful. Shit, why not try actually THANKING THEM rather than complain.

Thanksgiving Lesson NO 4: Don't make assumptions on generations that are different than your own. Especially when your only experience with a large yard-raking community effort  (they raked something like 300 yards that day, I'm sure young people were out helping) is the three people that came to your house.

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I worked an event this weekend call "Thanksgiving in Wine Country", its a fund raiser for the local wine association (to advertise about the awesome wine from our area) and a way for wineries to take part in the joy that is Black Friday--and the rest of the weekend. It's Fri-Sun, obviously.  Anyhow, lots of people come--they can choose to purchase the event pass, which is $30/person, gets a free glass, a wristband and then gets you special access to most wineries (some wineries aren't even open to general public; have to have a wristband to get in), or extra food, wine or special discounts. And it's good the entire weekend and includes something like 100 wineries. So, a good deal.

But lots of wineries are also opened to the general public. The one I work at? We didn't charge but asked for a donation to the local humane society (it is the season of giving, after all). That got people four wines to taste and some of the best burgundy beef stew in the world! (i made it. that was my job--but seriously, people were saying it was the best thing they've ever eaten--i think they were coming out of turkey comas), if you had a pass you got to go to our 'barrel room' where there were cheese to sample, reserve wines and chocolate truffles made from our wine.

Get the general idea? Other wineries would have something similar or would ask for you to pay at the door (donation or not) to cover their cost for this event, since we need extra staff and we're all serving food of some sort.

Right as people began to arrive on Friday we got a phone call from a local winery asking if we were charging. We explained our donation setup and they said they were charging at the door (we're not sure how much) and were met with huge complaints--cussing and what not--saying they were the ONLY ones doing that.

Not true.

Later in the day I was refilling the beef stew at the serving table and heading back to the kitchen when I heard a gentlemen complain about his service at our tasting room. He said, "I know! I can't believe this. Everywhere I go I feel like they're just trying to sell me their wine. Enough already. Like that girl? She poured me something and before I could even TRY it she said 'let me know if you'd like to purchase anything', can you believe that?!"

I almost, but did not, turned around and said "Yes, I can believe that. This is a mother fucking business and you're drinking and eating for FREE here--and yes, even if you made that $2 donation because that's going straight to the humane society. It's OUR JOB to sell you stuff, idiot". He did not have a wristband. I'm sure they were complaining about fees at other wineries.

Thanksgiving Lesson No. 5: Stop being so freaking cheap. If you can afford to drive around and taste wines all day you can afford a $30 pass for the weekend, or the $5 at the door some wineries are going to charge you. It's an obviously busy weekend; expect it.

Thanksgiving Lesson No. 6: while out shopping during the holidays (right before or right after) realize that you are in places of business where people ARE trying to sell you stuff. If they're helpful and nice, is there really anything to complain about--even if they try to SELL YOU SOMETHING, aka doing their job? Meanwhile, also if they're helpful and nice but can't find you what you want--don't throw a fit. It's not their fault (just from other retail jobs i've had around the holidays).

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Finally, the best--or rather worst--for last. My brother-in-law's family is a bit crazy. He lost his father about a year and a half ago. It was really hard on the family. But keep in mind my brother-in-law is in his early 50's and is the second to youngest 'child' in this family. These are ADULTS that I'll be talking about (in their 50s and 60s). The father was the glue for this family and when he died it literally fell apart. During his death one sister in particular started to flip out, C. She called and tried to get hospice stopped. If she was watching him she refused to give him his pain pills (yes, the VERY strong stuff--because he was dying and had cancer all over his body) because he might get addicted to them...

Pure denial he was dying. And not only denial but hot anger at my brother-in-law for 'letting him die'. During this C stopped talking to my brother-in-law and sister. They used to be pretty close. She loved their children and the kids would go spend weekends with her--but that obviously stopped as well.

Their mother has dementia, if not straight up alzehimers and is getting worse day by day. H, in the story above, is her new live-in caretaker (who's awesome by the way). C just doesn't acknowledge that her mother cannot think for herself anymore.

Anyhow, BIL and sister found out way too late that C was coming over for Thanksgiving. This surprised them. They had been planning on having the mom, H, and myself over for Thanksgiving--and that's it. Other parts of my sister and my family had other things to do, so it'd be a low key thanksgiving. Of course C could come, but they didn't want drama.

Then they found out through another sister that C was coming over for a few days and taking the mom to a cousin's house for thanksgiving dinner. BIL calls the cousin and confirms this, asks H if she'd rather have thanksgiving at this unknown cousins or with BIL and my sister. She said the latter, and BIL said it'd be a nice break for her. She agrees.

Meanwhile BIL and sister are upset that C didn't tell them she was coming (or whisking off the mother to a cousin's for thanksgiving). They could've sent H off to Seattle for a long weekend if they knew C could be there to take care of the mom. But they're not surprised C doesn't think this way.

9am on Thanksgiving H calls BIL and says "I'm sorry, but I don't think I can attend thanksgiving at your house. I'm told I'm excepted at the cousins and I don't want to be rude". BIL replies "oh no, unless you'd prefer to go there. I talked to my cousin, she's aware you're coming to dinner at our house--it's not a big deal, and we'd like it very much if you came here for thanksgiving". H replies that she would also, but is fearful of making a poor impression. So BIL says "Well, i'll be up in a minute. Tell C I will be and I'm bringing the kids to see her".

When he gets there the first thing C says to him, in front of the kids is "You're a BULLY!" and then begins to yell at him saying that he should let H make her own mind up about where she'd like to have thanksgiving. And that she had no right to call the cousin. And on and on and on...until he finally grabs the kids and asks H if she'd like to come also. She agrees.

H ended up staying until 2am at my BIL and sister's place. Ha. She also spent the entire following day with them as well. Obviously a break WAS needed.

Thanksgiving Lesson no 7: Grow up and be thankful for your family even if you don't agree with them, at least try not to yell at them in front of 8 year olds.

Thanksgiving Lesson no 8: Learn to be thankful for the people who are taking care of your loved ones--whether they're related or not. And learn to ask what THEY want, rather than make assumptions.


That's all I got. I had a nice Thanksgiving it's just that everywhere i turned i heard these stories of such ungrateful people it made me sick to my stomach. I heard a few other comments in the tasting room; people complaining about other wineries and what not...and I dunno. I almost lost it a few times. Luckily my job was in the kitchen, by myself. We're a very ungrateful society in general. I just expect people to shed that for a few days around Thanksgiving. I guess that brings me to ...

Thanksgiving Lesson no. 9: People are assholes. Don't expect anything more from them.

Any NYC Xangas still reading this? Rachael?! Jessica?!?! Other people I know i'm forgetting in nyc ?!?!

Or anyone planning on being in NYC Dec 2nd?  It's a Wed, just fyi.

Why? Because I got a special invite to attend a video premiere of one of my favorite Austin bands that have roots/connections in New York. When I got the invite I seriously thought about flying there for it, but given my upcoming trip to Australia...gotta save the money.

They're good. Really good. Really fun. Really nice. I'm sure my name could get changed to your name so you could attend freely (otherwise there's a cover charge).  So if interested...let me know.

That's all. More regular blog soon. Obviously, I'm not doing the blog every day thing. Kudos to those that are.

Applicable names thus far:

Rasputin
Lior
Ronan
Ramma-lamma-ding-dong
Dirk
Sir Ramsey
Ray C. Lewis
Randy
Vince Ferragamo
Paul
Puck
Buck Wild


if you've made suggestions and do not see the name on the list--there are reasons for it. Too long, too similar to other animals, can't bring myself to name animals after cars...and Chester--man. Chester. He actually does look like a Chester and it may indeed be the perfect name, but can't do it. An old high school friend's nick-name was Chester--probably why the Ram seems like chester to me, actually--but it'd be too weird calling him chester. mutual friends would probably think I've lost it.  Well, they probably think that already--but let's not give them any more reasons for it, shall we?

Anyhow, I gotta get this narrowed down. I not entirely sure how I'm going to do this--so if anyone has suggestions on that as well, I'm all ears. To name Lina von Lambykins I put up a simple voting box. But I may, indeed take this vote to the street (farmer's market). Or...I may just put all these names into a box (including submissions from the farmer's market) and pull one out of the hat (or, um box--but not THAT box, sickos)  and the winner gets a prize?

But what if he ends up with a stupid name then...eh? So ideas, folks! I appreciate it...and now you may continue the debate amongst yourselves....

I'm happy no one has suggest Rambo--do you know how many rams are named Rambo? Yes 3 million.

Where I write something, rather than just post pictures and talk of depressing things such as land burning up, animals dying and the like.

I took a small (as in short) vacation with a friend and we went to Walla Walla, WA. Home of sweet onions and wine. It's difficult to not just accidently wander into a tasting room when one visits Walla Walla. However, I'm proud to say we didn't visit one.

I'm sure that seems like a strange/weird statement. It also wasn't our intention. My friend dislikes wine so he wasn't interested in visiting the wineries/tasting rooms. However, he insisted we spend some time feeding my inner wino--so we had planned to go to a few wineries. Once there and the more we did and sought out--it became kind of a fun treasure hunt of a vacation. The obvious statement of 'what to do in Walla Walla' is to drink and taste wine. So what about the other things to do? We found them and more.

Of course there's more to this blog than my proud exclamation of not tasting wine in wine country.

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Our first night there was fairly unintresting but we went in search of a dive-bar. We didn't really NEED a dive-bar but it's the kind I prefer and my friend seems to like them, but only if I'm with him (I think otherwise he doesn't feel safe). What we really wanted was a bar with 'regulars' and some sort of bar 'sport'. Pool tables, darts, shuffle-board.

We found a promossing 'nascar' themed tavern in a plain cement block building. However when I peered in, I only saw one giant screen tv and nothing else (there were people and tables, but no sports). So I asked the guys standing out back smoking if there was a bar around that had shuffle board. Response?

Old guy smoking: Shuffle-board?! Are you from Flordia.
I shake my head about to explain what I mean by shuffle board, but he looks at my friend...
Old guy smoking looking at my friend: YOU'RE from Flordia, aren't you?
Then he laughs to himself thinking he's funny.

I smile and say: No, a shuffle-board table. YOU don't know what that is?
Old Guy: Oh! That.
Young Guy smoking: Not in this town.
Dave Mustaine Looking Guy: The Green Lantern used to have one
Young Guy smoking: Oh yeah, but not any more

After then asking about pool (none--except for bars that featured broken pool sticks and the Elk's lodge to which we were informed we could say we were THINKING about becoming members and they'd let us in), we left them to their obvious flirtation with a girl way too young for any of them.

I was highly disapointed by the state of bar games in this town. Especially a college town. So we went back down town and wandered some more where we did find some 'night-life'. A small wine bar had 'industry night' which seemed to be an outdoor patio with a few tables, about eight patrons (drinking wine) and a dj playing house music.

For some reason it was one of the most depressing/weird things I've ever witness. I stopped and stared. My friend chuckled to himself. I looked at him and said "This is one of the most depressing/weird things I've seen" and he said "I agree".

I think, mostly, because it was those nine people's idea of what 'cool' is. And that ain't cool. Nor fun. The music was so loud they weren't talking to each other. No one was dancing. They all looked bored.

So we ended the night by purchasing some pbr and drinking wine I brought in our hotel room.

Next day we saw a woman teetering around in the most ridiculious shoes I've ever seen. In fact her whole out fit was ridiculious.

I'm not one to notice this things, at all. Nor one to critisize people's choice of fashion. Oh yes, I'm judgemental but not on fashion. At all. I have no flair for it and wear things that I bought in middle school. So unless someone's showing too much skin or is wearing a full-on hot dog suit, I tend not to notice people's get-ups much.

However as we were eatting lunch at a nice little bistro this women came stumbling down the stairs. Then I noticed she couldn't walk and I thought she was drunk. I happened to look at her shoes and realized they were the source of her problem.

They were neon green--therefore hard to miss. But the heel part was at least 4 inches and I kid you not--a metal spike. She couldn't walk in those things to save her life.

But what might've been even more ridiculious than those shoes was the rest of her outfit. You'd think someone trying to walk around in neon green metal spike shoes would be wearing some sort of equally trashy outfit? No. Instead she had on a tweed pant and jacket suit. Her eye glasses were the same shade of green. And to top it all off? An old baseball hat.

My friend had his back to her so I said "did you notice that woman?" and he said "where her shoes neon green?" and I explained they were and had a metal spike for a heel, thus she couldn't walk. After I said that I heard a group of middle-aged people sitting behind my friend lamenting on her choice of outfit. Then they said what I had just said to my friend "I'm not one to comment on other people's fashion choice!"

But since we all did, it's obvious her outfit was ridculious. She couldn't walk AND she had to have been hot (it was in the upper 90's and she was sitting outside in her fitted tweed suit).

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Another fashion incident occurred later that evening. We went down to the bar at the hotel to have a nightcap. In doing so we passed through a room that seemed to be hosting quite the party--people drinking, toasting...laughing. Our one drink took about an hour to drink (more like it took about 40 minutes to make for some unknown reason and ten to drink). On the way out of the bar into the lobby we heard LOUD piano playing.

My friend said "oh no" when we heard it--it was obviously drunken piano playing. It wasn't BAD--some sort of classical tune, but it wasn't jiving just write. And really freaking loud. We figured out that the source of this bad piano playing was coming from the room that had had a swinging party in it an hour earlier. The room that we had to walk through to get to our wing of the hotel.

SO as we enter the room, bracing ourselves for some drunken seen and steeling our ears for the noise...this is what we saw;

An empty room, except for the standard furnishing. This hotel is a 'period' hotel--turn of the century (as in 1900). So it's got gold and reds. lush sitting couches--gold grand piano. Fire going in the fire place. Kind of a cross between a bordello and a french country home crica 1700.

Actually, found a picture:


This picture is good, as it's the view we had coming into the room. And indeed...it was empty of people know. But there were a few glasses of wine out, and some bottles of beer. The piano was in the far corner (in this picture blocked by the screen).

So we walk in looking around seeing the scattered alcohol. Hearing the music. A bit puzzeled there aren't more people around encouraging the drunken piano playing (or telling them to stop) then we get past that screen and get a view of the piano. And the piano-player.

The guy had a look of rhapsody on his face. Eyes closed--in that drunken consentration that one can get.

And he had no clothes on.





You know, I don't really have anything else to add to this story or the trip, really. So I'll just leave it at that.

Highly amusing.

The state teams left today. Seems smokey in some areas but done for the most part.

Here are some pictures--including a pictures of my brother's house that was REALLY threatened.